Please note that Vineeto’s correspondence below was written by the actually free Vineeto
(List D refers to Richard’s List D and his Respondent Numbers) Vineeto’s Selected Correspondence ‘Self’-Immolation June 27 2025 KUBA: What a fascinating experience I just had! I can’t sleep now following it so I thought I might as well write about it. So I was in that half-asleep state in bed about 15min ago and I was enjoying a very fascinating journey through the psyche. It was as if ‘I’ was taken on a journey through the entirety of ‘my’ life but the key aspect was that it was clear that ‘I’ have been nothing but a marionette pulled by the strings of conditioning. It was a very fun journey and ‘I’ was definitely enjoying it in a fascinated way. What blew ‘me’ away is what lay at the very inception of this conditioning, because it seems that since the marionette is being pulled in this and that way that ‘someone’ or ‘something’ is ‘behind it all’, and furthermore that ‘they/it’ must be working to some ‘higher purpose’. And so as ‘I’ was moving through the journey ‘I’ eventually got to the very start of it all, the beginning – ‘I’ was astounded to find no-one at all. There was no god, no ‘higher intelligence’, no ultimate meaning etc. What ‘I’ discovered is perfectly described by the words – blind nature. In that indeed the conditioning is pulling on the marionette and yet there is ‘noone’ or ‘nothing’ ‘behind it all’ – it is all simply a set of blind instinctual patterns. Now this might not seem as big as I initially made it out. But the ramifications are huge! It means that there is absolutely no purpose or meaning at all to suffering, it means that all those people who suffered or sacrificed or died for any of the causes which flow from the conditioning – it all happened for absolutely nothing at all. It means that no matter how noble or sophisticated the various belief systems, it is all over absolutely nothing at all. ‘I’ still remember the surprise that ‘I’ experienced, to find ‘noone/ nothing’ at all ‘behind it all’, simply a set of blind instinctual patterns – of course ‘humanity’ has turned these into something rather romantic and made a ginormous hoo-ha out of it all, and yet it is all over absolutely nothing, no meaning or purpose ‘behind it’ at all. VINEETO: Hi Kuba, Isn’t this a great discovery! This apperceptive insight lived experientially is the end of believing any and all principles and concepts, axioms and ideals, tenets and illusions (as long as you comply with the legal laws and observe the social protocols). Now there is nothing (credible) in the way to altruistically allow, with supreme confidence, the very core of ‘being’ itself – the selfish instinct for individual survival – to disappear into the same “‘nothing’ ‘behind it all’”. Cheers Vineeto June 28 2025 VINEETO: When everything is swept out from under the carpet, there is nothing left to hide, to defend, to hold precious, or to fear. Simply stillness – the stillness of infinite space and eternal time. KUBA: Yes I see this now, it makes clear why ‘I’ was running into that “invisible wall” over and over in an attempt to ‘go somewhere’, it is ‘me’ trying to take ‘myself’ into actuality. This was the point which took the longest to sink in, that ‘I’ do not ‘go somewhere’, ‘I’ stay still until ‘my’ full exposure happens, it is when ‘I’ become extinct that there is only the stillness left, the destination was here all along. VINEETO: Indeed – it is impossible to imagine how one’s own extinction will happen – it is unimaginable. KUBA: That apperceptive seeing which took place last night is “swishing around” currently, it was a big one! It seems that currently it is still at a slight distance from ‘me’, in that there is the seeing just ‘over there’ and then there is ‘me’ as ‘I’ am. What I mean is that it has not fully and completely sunk in that this “crude and blind instinctual programming” is ‘me’ as ‘I’ am. It is like this slightest distancing which allows ‘me’ to remain. But it seems like ‘I’ cannot distance ‘myself’ for long, this is what ‘I’ mean by this seeing “swishing around”. Or I guess it is more accurate to say that ‘I’ have turned the apperceptive seeing into a realisation, hence the distance and the “swishing around”. VINEETO: That’s why I said “this apperceptive insight lived experientially” (Actualism, Actualvineeto, Kuba8, 27 June 2025) – you seem to be in the gestation phase to let it sink in and eventuate (actualise). KUBA: What I do see though, and this is also big, is that ‘I’ don’t have to push towards ‘my’ self-immolation, and neither is it something ‘I’ do, it is ‘my’ full exposure that makes it inevitable. And now ‘I’ am willing to be exposed, because ‘I’ have seen the very core of ‘me’. There is confidence that it cannot go wrong, that it is ultimately safe for ‘me’ to be exposed, and for this exposure to end ‘me’. VINEETO: Now you know experientially what Richard was talking about – Richard: Perfection is already always here. Yet ‘I’, by believing in a remembered perfection, chase an ever-elusive chimera into an ever-receding future. Thus one stands still and does nothing but watch the dust settle all around ... and perfection, which is only of the moment, becomes apparent. ‘I’ have ceased to be. By “doing nothing” I mean neither believing nor disbelieving; neither having faith nor having doubt; neither trusting nor distrusting; neither hoping nor despairing. In short, one’s superb confidence and over-weening optimism precipitates ‘my’ demise ... ‘I’ do not make freedom happen ... ‘I’ allow the universe to “disappear” the ‘me’ that I was ... and perfection has become apparent. ‘I’ did not invoke perfection, for it already is here ... and it is here now, not off into the future. It may have taken some time to eventuate, as ‘I’ got whittled away, yet when that time came, it was already here ... because it is always now. (Richard, Private email, March 1999) KUBA: There is something that I keep getting a glimpse of and I wonder if this is more of ‘me’ trying to take ‘myself’ into actuality or if it is genuine, it seems to me to be the latter. It reminds me of what Srinath wrote on this forum some time ago, to paraphrase it was that when he became actually free it was akin to one of those optical illusion images – where for example one only sees a witch until something shifts and only a rabbit is seen. Except that in this case there would be no way at all to ever see the witch again. This seems to be the “seamless transition” aspect, it doesn’t mean that it is not a total end for ‘me’, because it is, it’s not that ‘I’ am seeing life in a different manner. It’s more that in an instant and with no transition period ‘I’ become extinct and actuality becomes apparent, then it is known with absolute certainty that only actuality genuinely exists, that ‘I’ was never genuine. These glimpses that I keep getting are along these lines, that it is very very close and it can certainly happen now, there is nothing of substance that would prevent such a thing from happening. Also I can see that indeed it is the end for ‘me’ and yet it is completely safe. It is safe because of this aspect of actuality being instantaneously revealed to be already always here now. VINEETO: Ha, the only comment I will make is that you have a playful propensity to look around the next corner before you turn the corner. I think they are inventing telescopes for that. KUBA: So these glimpses they are providing ‘me’ with utmost confidence to proceed towards ‘my’ extinction. As Richard said it cannot be a 100% certainty until it clicks into place but it is a supreme confidence (as far as ‘I’ can have) in that it is seen that a world exists after ‘my’ demise. VINEETO: I enjoy your “utmost confidence” as much as you do. All you have left to do now is to enjoy and appreciate. Cheers Vineeto June 29 2025 KUBA: Some more wonderful experiences are going on this morning, I woke up and experienced that flavour of the burden of ‘being’, of existing across the past – present – future as an identity, of existing in a cell of ‘my’ own making, of living out the “story of ‘my’ life”. But now I can see that there is an alternative, that ‘I’ can cease ‘being’, that ‘I’ don’t have to carry that burden anymore, it’s so simple! Because only ‘I’ exist across the past – present – future, this flesh and blood body does not, it is not coming from anywhere or going somewhere, it only exists here where this moment is happening, and it is the doing of what is happening. Before there was always this sense that ‘I’ had to muster a wanting to cease ‘being’, perhaps to overcome the strength of ‘my’ survival instincts, there was some kind of an internal struggle going on, with the wanting to cease ‘being’ on one hand and the drive to survive at all cost on the other. But this morning I am solidly experiencing that ‘I’ do indeed want to cease ‘being’, not in a sense of mustering anything, rather that it is simply what ‘I’ want. It is the end of all struggle, of all suffering, of all sorrow and malice. ‘I’ realise that ‘I’ am happy to give up the “story of ‘my’ life”, that it is not worth keeping anymore. It only ever brought pain and conflict. VINEETO: Hi Kuba, This is a great way of phrasing it – ‘I’ am nothing other than “the “story of ‘my’ life””, nothing more substantial than a (highly passionate) story. Of course, this “story” is held in place by all the genetically inherited instinctual passions and the culturally increated folkways and social mores but once you take those apart and experience the passions in their rawness the “story” itself becomes untenable. Hence Richard dismissing all narratives and only being interested in facts and actuality – Richard: In case that is not clear enough: I neither have a ‘narrative’ nor any interest in some person’s ‘narrative’ – other than to expose it for the crock it always is (by virtue of being a ‘narrative’) – as I am only ever interested in facts and actuality. (Richard, List D, No. 6, 20 June 2013). And with “the “story of ‘my’ life”” seen as insubstantial the internal struggle ceases as a result of the matter-of-fact recognition, seeing the fact, and then it simply makes sense to cease ‘being’. No struggle, no fear, no resistance. Actuality prevails over narrative – it’s a simple as that. As Geoffrey said – Geoffrey: I realised that I would indeed gladly die right now, gladly give away all I am, all I ever was, all I’ve done and felt since I was born, for peace-on-earth to be apparent (not even for me but) for everybody. For things to be as they are. And that it would be of no importance at all. No ‘weight’, no drama… just the only thing that made sense, the only sensible thing. (Geoffrey, Report on Becoming Free) KUBA: But what I am constantly amazed by is that the destination is right under my nose, this body is already here, everything is already in place, ‘I’ simply have to disappear. VINEETO: Yes, and that is the only reason why you can even contemplate to cease ‘being’ as a solution recognising that “‘being’ is suffering”, in fact why you are able to even fully acknowledge this – because of the supreme confidence that there is a much, much better alternative. And that fact in itself is so overwhelmingly amazing, to sweetly encouraging for those who are cognisant of the actual alternative. KUBA: As I was contemplating all this a few minutes ago I saw the ‘imprint’ that is ‘me’, that this will be erased. This ‘imprint’ of ‘being’ it is painful in itself somehow, that as long as ‘I’ am ‘being’ ‘I’ will suffer. It’s fascinating why this is so? Why is it that ‘being’ is suffering? I saw it just a moment ago ‘I’ was sat right there and seen to be nothing but suffering. That the very flavour of ‘being’ is suffering. ‘I’ am like a hot coal that is tightly grasped for no good reason at all. And this sense that the hot coal must be grasped, it is like a commandment – the very thrust of the survival instincts and also reinforced by society. This commandment carries this seemingly all powerful authority, that it is the 1 thing ‘I’ am never ever allowed to go against. But then I have already seen ‘behind the curtains’ of both blind nature and society, this authority has been exposed for a furphy. VINEETO: Indeed, and this imperative, this ‘self’-survival mechanism is operating for everyone – until someone, anyone, looks “behind the curtains” and finds out, for a fact, that ‘me’ is only a narrative, a fraud, an impostor. It’s a wondrous adventure to do that. KUBA: Hehe there is a conversation which Vineeto quoted a while back which just popped into my mind : Richard: There is no cure to be found in the ‘real world’ … only never-ending ‘band-aid’ solutions. Vineeto: The devastation is enormous and the only way ‘out’ is ‘self’-sacrifice. Richard: Yet it is the instinct for survival that got you and me and every other body here in the first place. We peoples living today are the end-point of myriads of survivors passing on their genes … we are the product of the ‘success story’ of fear and aggression and nurture and desire. Is one really going to abandon that which produced one … that which (apparently) keeps one alive? Do you recall those conversations we had about loyalty (familial and group loyalty) back when you and I first met … and what was required to crack that code? That was chicken-feed compared with this one. [Emphasis added]. (Richard, Actual Freedom List, Vineeto, 30 September 1999) So yes I can see this now, there is the loyalty to the human constitution which in itself is no little thing to crack, and yet there is the loyalty to the human condition (to suffering) which does make the prior look like chicken-feed. VINEETO: Oh yes, ‘Vineeto’ never forgot that conversation where Richard was actually caring in telling ‘her’ from the start what was required and that it would be much bigger than the “chicken-feed” of abandoning loyalty. It nevertheless took ‘her’ another 10 years and 9 weeks to “crack that code”, like you are about to do, but one thing ‘she’ knew all the way that ‘she’ would never ‘do a Devika’, i.e. give up. What a grand adventure! Cheers Vineeto June 30 2025 VINEETO: What about pure intent – do you experience the perfection of infinitude, the overarching benignity and benevolence emanating from the purity of the stillness beckoning you – or is your focus after all this still zeroed in on ‘you’ and ‘your’ fading story? You said yesterday – Kuba: This is also nice to read, how ‘Vineeto’ approached ‘her’ quest, because ‘I’ have had the very same approach from the very start, and still do – that there is absolutely no possibility that ‘I’ will give up. Can it be that presently ‘you’ are not ready yet to “give up” on ‘you’? Yet here is what you said six days ago – Kuba: It’s like that last step into the unknown is a different step than any ‘I’ have ever taken, it doesn’t follow the same rules to any other actions which ‘I’ have ever been involved in. This is what Richard meant that it is the easiest thing in the world and the hardest thing in the world. Perhaps you are trying to employ the same techniques as those which got you to this point, deliberating and doubting, weighing the evidence, searching for something you have overlooked … just to avoid taking “that last step into the unknown” – which is to agree to cheerfully and gaily, acquiesce altruistically and willingly, curiously and confidently allow ‘your’ demise to happen, knowing with superb inevitability that the resulting actual innocence will be for the benefit of all. In other words, “that last step” is not of your doing, it is giving the permission to let it happen (by not interfering one way or the other). Cheers Vineeto July 1 2025 KUBA: Wow Vineeto your post… it’s like every word landed bullseye on the intended target, which is ‘me’. (…) There is stillness all around, the experience of it is amplified now as all that other ‘noise’ cleared away. (…) It is very wonderful to consider that all ‘I’ have left to do is to allow the universe to disappear ‘me’. ‘I’ don’t resist it anymore, in fact it is so very peaceful for ‘me’ right now. VINEETO: Hi Kuba, I appreciate you understand – and the fact you report the “stillness all around” is confirmation that you do. Appreciate this “stillness all around” as much as you can and then some more, it’s the most wonderful, mirificent and magically sweet way of experiencing being alive. KUBA: But the one thing which I hadn’t quite put together is that giving permission is by not interfering in one way or another. Perhaps it is that ‘I’ still believe that ‘I’ am required to crack the code. VINEETO: Ha, it’s always the hardest thing to acknowledge that ‘I’ am redundant, even though you experientially and apperceptively know that ‘you’ are. ‘You’ have done your job and have done it well, ‘you’ can contentedly retire having earned ‘your’ longed-for oblivion. Cheers Vineeto August 25, 2025 JESUSCARLOS: It’s Friday afternoon, and my partner is encouraged to give me feedback on my way of being and acting over the past week. Above all, she emphasizes that I’m like “absent”. Absorbed in my worries, too busy with my phone, not here and now. She rightly resents this. I receive it with discomfort but at the same time with openness, sticking to the facts: she’s right. It’s Saturday, and since the day before, I’ve tried to abandon my worries and be here, with attentiveness. We hike through the forest until we reach a waterfall at the far end. We’re alone. After a period of relaxation, a moment of pure awareness occurs. I marvel at the stillness of the rock while the majestic curtain of water falls steadily. I mention this to her, and she makes a humorous comment that makes us laugh for a while. “Yes, it’s very still, but the water is also damaging it slowly.” We called her thought the “anti-zen” thought of doom. All this reminds me that perfection comes with a high dose of humour. It’s Sunday and we’re at the cinema. We went to see the new “Dracula”. Two-thirds of the way through the film, I realize I’m feeling fear. But it has nothing to do with the film. Upon closer inspection, I realize it’s almost a panic attack. I think that if this feeling increases, I’ll either vomit, or run, or throw myself on the floor. But as best I can, I keep my hands in my pockets. I observe. Thoughts come and go, all of them doubts, fears, regarding actual freedom. What if this is just another manipulation? What if it’s an algorithm to program humans to no longer question anything and conform to the current regime? What if I become an inert robot by taking that step? What if Vineeto is actually an agent of the Matrix? (that film had a deep impact on me in my youth), etc. VINEETO: Hi Jesus Carlos, I understand your fear but you are misled by your feelings. About three years before becoming free ‘Vineeto’ expressed a similar sentiment when ‘she’ said to Richard, “to me you represent death”. Richard laughed and then said “I’m just a bloke”. Today I can say the same thing to you – I am just an old woman. As you said above – “perfection comes with a high dose of humour”. JESUSCARLOS: I clearly realize that these thoughts arise from an emotional reaction to the realization that my defence mechanisms cause suffering and aren’t truly necessary (Saturday’s EE/PCE realization). And I can clearly see that they are a core part of my identity, but that eliminating them means eliminating all of me; just one part can’t go. This insight increases my fear, almost to the point of terror. “My feelings are me, and I am my feelings”; “becoming my own best friend in this, isn’t something imposed on me, it’s something I choose for myself”; “This is for the good of humanity, it’s for its good, and for all the others I affect with my interactions, my absences”; “what is known is uncertain, uncertainty is the necessary step toward finding a solution”; “stick to the facts. What do the facts say? Don’t my interactions, my decisions, my will to fully be here improve when I really enjoy and appreciate this moment of being alive?” This last thought is the one that has the greatest impact on overcoming fear (because is not only a thought, is a connection with pure intent). I begin to experience a reduction of fear, recognizing that through facts, and not through my beliefs or daydreams, there is a clear and evident truth (paraphrasing René Descartes). The concrete experience of what is truly beneficial is the guide on this wide and wonderful path. Little by little, terror is replaced by the sweetness of this realization, which also awakens memories of my life in which I have always been searching for the final solution to my suffering. VINEETO: Have you ever thought that it might be the other way round, that your fear is created by ‘me’ wanting to force ‘me’ to do something ‘I’ am not ready to voluntarily do? In this case this is not pure intent informing you but passions pitched against each other in order to keep ‘me’ in existence. JESUSCARLOS: At this point, the film’s plot (spoiler alert) connects with the emotional thread of my feelings and thoughts, and the acceptance of the main character’s death as an altruistic decision that frees others from his own burden makes even more sense. I’m amazed by this synchronicity. VINEETO: I don’t know the film but this is not synchronicity but real-world sentimental fantasy for bitter-sweet feel-good effect. JESUSCARLOS: The film ends. I’m not in a PCE, but in a kind of IE/EE, experiencing a lot of sweetness and intimacy. And I tell my partner what happened. Tears run. And I’m incredibly grateful with her for having the courage to tell me what she’d been noticing these past few days about my way of withdrawing from being here, as a defence mechanism. And that reminded me that what is the most important for me is to truly give all of myself to her, and to the rest of living human bodies. VINEETO: As you describe well, the effect of this fantasy is that you feel grateful, not appreciative, towards your partner – which is a ‘good’ feeling not a felicitous/ innocuous feeling. You would be misleading yourself to compare that to pure intent and your aim to altruistically ‘self’-immolate for the benefit of this body (which does not die when ‘I’ become extinct), that body and every body. JESUSCARLOS: I see what happened as a positive sign of progress, a kind of preparation for facing/ understanding that wall of fear behind which freedom could lie. At least a virtual one. VINEETO: Now to the main reason I am replying to your post – “understanding that wall of fear”. While one does experience fear in the process of becoming free, for instance, when there is resistance to admit to this or that aspect of the identity, and one certainly needs daring to persist, it is nevertheless important to understand that it is always a self-induced suffering. ‘I’ am feeding the fear, either by fighting against it or by wanting to have something immediately which needs a gentler more friendly approach, especially when it comes to ‘my’ extinction. Stand back and have a chuckle about the antics ‘I’ get up to and get back to feeling good. Perhaps the following quote will make things clearer regarding “that wall of fear” – RESPONDENT: I find it particularly interesting that with more recent experiences of becoming free, for example Peter, Vineeto, and others you’ve related – there was no wall of fear or dread. The process was ‘matter of fact,’ ‘simple,’ ‘easy.’ RICHARD: That is because they all became (newly) free via the well-publicised epoch-changing opening in human consciousness designated as the ‘direct route’ on the ‘A Long-Awaited Public Announcement’ web page on The Actual Freedom Trust website. Here are the very first words on that web page: • ‘The directors of The Actual Freedom Trust take great pleasure in making public knowledge of a direct route at the end of the wide and wondrous path (now both gentrified and rendered secure) to an actual freedom from the human condition – a down-to-earth manumission [from Latin manumittere, lit. ‘send out from one’s hand’, and meaning release from slavery; release from bondage or servitude; set free] hitherto only available dangerously via spiritual enlightenment/ mystical awakenment ...’. (Long Awaited Announcement). RESPONDENT: How can current actualists bypass such acute experiences of dread on the ‘path’ to freedom? RICHARD: By tapping into pure intent – nowadays also personified in its feminine aspect (its masculine aspect became personified 30+ months after 1992) – hitherto only accessible via a PCE. RESPONDENT: Are they [such acute experiences] merely an idiosyncrasy of different personalities, or are they tied to an approach or attitude? RICHARD: Neither ... they came about because (a) nobody had gone beyond spiritual enlightenment/ mystical awakenment before ... and (b) the direct route (opened by Peter and Richard on the 29th of December, 2009) was yet to be forged back then. RESPONDENT: Is there a strategy that can be utilized to bypass or minimize such experiences? RICHARD: Yep ... tapping into pure intent should do the trick nicely. For instance: #10876 From: richard.actualfreedom Date: Sat Feb 4, 2012 12:16 am Subject: Re: [...] about two types of Actual Freedom • [James] [...] Is the pce necessary? ps: Is the pce necessary for pure intent to come out of this vast stillness? • [Richard]: G’day James, Prior to 11.25 AM (AEDST) on Saturday, the 14th of November, 2009, a pure consciousness experience (PCE) was indeed necessary for pure intent – that benevolence and benignity of the vast and utter stillness of the universe itself – and the reason why a PCE was essential is reported/ described/ explained both on The Actual Freedom Trust website and in ‘Richard’s Journal’. [...] what the feeling-being inhabiting this flesh-and-blood body all those years ago experienced as an ‘over-arching benevolence and benignity’ was experienced by the feeling-being ‘Peter’, on the 29th of December 2009, as [quote] ‘a sweetness that was palpable’ [endquote] and that ‘he’ was [quote] ‘literally being bathed in this sweetness’ [endquote]. [...]. Other people have reported experiencing that over-arching benevolence and benignity as a palpable sweetness as well. Pamela, for instance, spoke of it in those terms during the ten minutes or so immediately prior to the pivotal event/ the definitive moment when she became actually free of the instinctual passions/ the feeling-being formed thereof on the 27th of January 2010. (On another occasion, about three weeks later, she reported experiencing it as being an ‘infinite tenderness’ of such a magnitude as to render her incoherent upon endeavouring to describe it to Vineeto). Vineeto [...snip...] has written of it, in a private email, as being ‘an overwhelming sweetness, so overwhelmingly sweet that tears were running down my face. At another time I experienced a tenderness so vast that I was speechless for a good time afterwards’. I mention these reports so as to demonstrate that what the feeling-being inhabiting this flesh-and-blood body all those years ago experienced as an ‘over-arching benevolence and benignity’ may not necessarily be exactly the way others experience it. [...]. (Message 10876, Richard, List D, James, 4 February 2012). (Richard, List D, No. 25a, 25 May 2015) The whole correspondence from 25 May 2015 is well-worth reading from the beginning because it drives the point home even more. As you might have gathered by now, when you are a friend to yourself and look at/ sort out the various obstacles to being happy and harmless, enjoying and appreciating each moment of being alive, when you become more and more naïve, like yourself and others, then you can follow the wide and wondrous path of felicitous discoveries and appreciative amazement, then there is no need to get lost in the scary thicket of self-created fear, sorrow and bitter-sweet fantasy. Then, following pure intent, one day the choice is so crystal-clear and irresistibly attractive, then the facts speak for themselves and inevitably trigger ‘my’ permission to the only obvious action which is not of ‘my’ doing. Cheers Vineeto September 26 2025 ALAN: Was this not enough? Was it not better to enjoy this life as ‘Alan’, the personality, than risk all on an unknown future? RICHARD: I can recall the ‘Richard’ that was considering this very question ... yet ‘he’ just knew that ‘he’ would not be able to look in the mirror of a morning if ‘he’ did not proceed. Is it an admixture of pride and dignity, perhaps? (Richard, Actual Freedom List, Alan-a, 16 September 1999) KUBA: This quote from Richard has been on my mind, indeed it describes the situation well for ‘me’. I remember what ‘I’ was like 10 years ago and ‘I’ would have given anything to experience life in the manner that ‘I’ do now. And yet ‘I’ know that it is still second best, the thing is the first place is not for ‘me’! So it is that either ‘I’ would continue to live the second best or ‘I’ give up all of ‘myself’ so that this body, that body and everybody can live the first place. It’s not ‘me’ giving up second place so that ‘I’ can have the first place, rather it is ‘me’ giving up the best that ‘I’ can have for something infinitely better for this body, that body and everybody. VINEETO: Hi Kuba, The fascinating aspect of your observation when comparing your life today with what it was ten years ago, is that without wanting to go all the way you wouldn’t be how you are today (as you say yourself further below). The pure intent garnered from your PCEs was part and parcel of your journey. It may be different for everyone how they choose to live their lives but feeling being ‘Vineeto’ always knew that virtual freedom, both before and after being out-from-control, was a precarious stage and could be lost any time if/ when pure intent was lost. So even in those periods when ‘Vineeto’ was ‘running away’, procrastinating or feeling stuck, there was one grim determination that made ‘her’ persist and that was “don’t do a Devika”, i.e. don’t ever turn away completely. Devika, when transmogrifying into Irene gave ‘her’ an excellent demonstration of what not to do. It all helped to finally leave my ‘self’ behind. KUBA: And it is odd that ‘I’ know that ‘I’ will do that exactly, as Richard wrote “Is it an admixture of pride and dignity, perhaps?” – After-all ‘I’ did set off on this adventure in order to go all the way, and furthermore how could ‘I’ ever settle for ‘my’ second best when ‘I’ know something so much better is available, just not for ‘me’ haha. VINEETO: Indeed, and it’s more than “an admixture of pride and dignity” in ‘Vineeto’s’ experience, it is also the pure intent, even when temporary dormant. It can be resurrected any time you ask for it. After all, the beneficence and benevolence of the actual universe itself is right here now the moment you direct your attention to it. KUBA: So I have been fascinated that there is this capacity which ‘I’ have, an aspect of the programming bestowed by blind nature which can be utilised in order to end the human condition. And that this aspect of the programming does not require any learning or cultivating or anything like that, it requires the correct situation in order to be triggered. And I don’t mean that ‘I’ passively sit back and wait for something to happen. Rather I mean that the gun is already loaded and the finger is on the trigger, it’s all set to go in other words (this is not in reference to any “special psychic gun” btw, just that ‘I’ am already capable of altruism by nature of being a ‘self’). VINEETO: Instead of thinking about altruism as a programming or a “psychic gun” (i.e. conceptually), there is an easier way to approach it experientially – you can become aware of such situations whenever you have a choice of being less self-centric than you would habitually be, simply because it feels good. Being less ‘self’-centric is the natural consequence of more and more naïve enjoyment and appreciation. Increasing kindness, generosity, magnanimity, bonhomie, friendliness and consideration will noticeably decrease being concerned about ‘me’ and ‘my’ problems, and appreciation, marvel and wonderment widen the outlook and horizon about all the magnificent happening beyond ‘my’ own narrow horizon – and a magical fairy-tale-like world becomes more and more apparent. Cheers Vineeto September 26 2025 KUBA: Yes I can 100% remember those kind of instances, in fact I was thinking about this yesterday, that the good/bad feelings are identity enhancing, whereas in the direction of felicity and innocuity ‘I’ as ‘self’ become more and more… irrelevant? it’s like the good/bad feelings draw a deeper and harder boundary to ‘me’ as ‘self’, whereas with those felicitous feelings ‘I’ am almost as if slowly being rubbed out, of course never quite but it can lead to a marked diminishment in that feeling of separation. So yes I can experience times when ‘I’ am being far less ‘self’-centric and it is always wonderful when it happens. But is this altruism? Or is your point that it can lead to where altruism can be activated? VINEETO: Hi Kuba, Softening the boundaries of ‘me’ allows you to consider everyone, who is not ‘me’, else why even contemplate an altruistic act. Remember the long correspondence Richard had with Srinath regarding real-world compassionate/ non-compassionate caring and near-actual caring, which I recently recommended to you? • [Vineeto]: “The key component for both of us had been caring, a caring as close to an actual caring as an identity can muster. [...] my caring for him meant whittling away my identity as much as possible in order to give him *(and me)* the intimacy *we both* yearned for”. [emphases added]. (Direct Route, James, 17 January 2010). • [Vineeto]: “I sat in this group, as one of many, and my sole interest was that everyone present *(including me as one of those present)* enjoyed themselves/ obtained the maximum benefit from our meeting”. [emphasis added]. (Direct Route, James, 16 January 2010). Richard: Thus the “caring as close to an actual caring as an identity can muster” that Vineeto wrote about (as quoted by Claudiu much further above) – which appears to have become known as a ‘near-actual caring’ these days – is self-evidently a caring which prioritises an actual happiness over an affective happiness any day of the week (else it be a gussied up real-world caring masquerading as a caring which is as close to an actual caring as an identity can muster). (Richard, List D, Srinath2, 28 July 2016). Perhaps a refreshing of this – and the follow up – correspondence on that page is helpful for you to recognize the correlation of being harmless, considerate, kind, gentle, generous, magnanimous, friendly, and therefore less ‘self’-centric and self-absorbed, and thus able to, and interested in, an increasing caring and inter-personal intimacy to the point of an acutely-empathic caring (equivalent to a near-actual-caring), which for ‘Vineeto’ motivated ‘her’ altruistic action. Perhaps it’s also worth emphasising that being out-from-control is epitomized by a complete absence of self-centredness – Richard: 3. Due to ‘her’ naïve intent to be as intimate and without prejudice as possible – which, in conjunction with the absence of self-centredness/ self-centricity that is part-and-parcel of being out-from-control had resulted in the actualism method segueing into the actualism process – ‘her’ cheerful and thus willing concurrence allowed pure intent to dynamically pull ‘her’ evermore unto ‘her’ destiny. (Hence the “dynamic, destinal virtual freedom” nomenclature). [Emphasis added]. (Richard, List D, Srinath2, 13 August 2016). Point 4, 5 and 6 should complete the understanding for you how it is all related (if possibly without becoming a concept). KUBA: So I seem to be a little confused here… Richard has written that altruism sets in motion a process which leads to ‘my’ self-immolation and you have written to me that once altruism is activated it can be all over in an instant. Is it that as ‘I’ become less and less ‘self’-centric as an ongoing modus operandi that ‘I’ invite a situation where altruism is activated and ‘I’ am extirpated OR is it that “keeping the window open” of this ongoing progression into being less and less ‘self’-centric is altruism in operation, that this is the process which will lead to ‘my’ demise? VINEETO: Being “less and less ‘self’-centric” is not altruism, it is thinning out the dominance of ‘me’ in order to allow the universe to live me. Altruism is a single act which leads to ‘my’ demise. ‘Vineeto’ didn’t even think about altruism at the end, it just happened when all fell into place. Or to put it another way, you can’t think your way out of existence. There is no either-or, the only process is as Geoffrey put it so brilliantly – Geoffrey: When one knows what it is one wants, and when one knows what it is one must sacrifice, then only the sensible action remains. I simply suggested an experiential approach the way ‘Vineeto’ experienced and utilized it. KUBA: Also is it possible to altruistically set the process in motion and then to obstruct it from completion? Furthermore is that what I have been doing by magically finding another ‘problem’ each time? VINEETO: Yes, having read all of what you have written so far, this is entirely possible. But then again, dealing with your objection to physical death one day, and giving up your dream of your soul’s immortality was certainly a necessary beneficial process. Cheers Vineeto September 30 2025 VINEETO to Kuba: Self-immolation can not happen from a moment of apperception or from a PCE, or even several PCEs in a row, it is a definite job ‘I’ have to do, as an identity, when all of ‘me’ is in agreement with ‘my’ final demise. Hence my emphasis that ‘I’ need to be an all-inclusive ally in this task – the only and most important task of one’s life. Hence ‘your’ job involves channelling all your affective energy (your libido for instance) into felicitous and innocuous affective energy via naïve enjoyment and abundant appreciation. (Actualism, Actualvineeto, Kuba10, 29 September 2025a). JAMES: This quote above by Vineeto is something I have never fully grasped. Self immolation is something ‘I’ have to do by being. happy and harmless. VINEETO: Hi James, Good to hear from you. What I wrote above is sort of encapsulates why the actualism is so perfect to successfully facilitate imitating the actual and eventually clearing the way for making ‘self’-immolation possible. Now that you understand it more comprehensively perhaps you are even more motivated to enjoy and appreciate this moment of being alive. You might also appreciate this quote, which I sent to Kuba yesterday, explaining why putting everything on a preference basis is an essential tip for feeling good – Richard: A general rule of thumb is: if it is a preference it is a self-less inclination; if it is an urge it is a self-centred desire. (Richard, Actual Freedom List, 25d, 14 January 2004) I wish you the best success in ongoing, or ever-increasing, enjoyment and appreciation. Cheers Vineeto December 9 2025 KUBA: Hi Vineeto and Adam-H, Vineeto to Adam-H: Ah, have you considered how feeling happy and harmless, even when 23hrs a day, compares to being spontaneously felicitous and innocuous every moment of your life? This is not merely a difference in degree but a qualitative difference in kind, so much so that it is inconceivable/ incomprehensible and unimaginable/ unbelievable to any identity whatsoever. It is entirely outside of ‘my’ territory. (Actualvineeto, Adam-H, 9 December 2025). Wow what an incredible description. When I read this it was the word spontaneously that caught my attention. I read your response to Chrono just before and the quote you provided from Richard explains this spontaneous felicity and innocuity every moment of one’s life : Richard: The purity of life emerges from the perfection that wells up constantly due to an immense stillness which is utterly immense in its scope and magnitude. This stillness of infinitude is that something which is precious. It is the life-giving foundation of all that is apparent. This stillness happens as me. This stillness is my essential disposition, for it is the principle character, the intrinsic basis of everything. It is this universe at its genesis. It is not, as it might commonly be supposed, at the centre of everything … there is no centre here. This stillness, which is everywhere all at once, is the be all and end all of life itself. I am the universe experiencing itself as a sensate, reflective human being. [Emphasis by Kuba]. (Richard’s Journal, Article 25, pp. 179f). Certainly not just a difference in degree haha! I have experienced recently that there is an unbelievable perfection and purity, and it happens without any input from ‘me’, it is here already. When ‘I’ get out of the way then it is seen that the entire world is like this and it is all happening already, of its own accord. Which explains the below a little more : Adam H: It is becoming more clear to me how ‘I’ in my essence am diametrically opposed to the happiness and harmlessness, and every time I take credit for it and turn it into my system it loses its purity and gradually degrades.t is becoming more clear to me how ‘I’ in my essence am diametrically opposed to the happiness and harmlessness, and every time I take credit for it and turn it into my system it loses its purity and gradually degrades. It’s because that perfection and purity has got nothing to do with ‘me’, ‘I’ can only spoil it by getting involved. ‘I’ allow this perfection and purity – which is already here – by getting out of the way. ‘I’ am not needed at all to maintain or generate it, and this is perhaps the thing that can take so long for ‘me’ to fully comprehend and accept. That time and time again ‘I’ get involved and then notice when looking back that there is now a lack of perfection and purity… So then this other sweet possibility hoves into view – could it be that ‘I’ am only standing in the way of it. VINEETO: Dear Kuba, I can’t resist answering – YES, it is so, “that ‘I’ am only standing in the way of it”. Such a simple matter once you apperceptively know it – and yet it can take half a life-time to experientially see it and concede it. Cheers and appreciation. Vineeto
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